Improve your dating chances by saying "Hello" to 10 strangers a day

Being born and raised in Los Angeles, but spending the past decade in the San Francisco Bay Area, I find myself beginning to understand why there is so much animosity from some Northern Californians towards Southern California. Finding myself travelling more and more to LA for work recently (and moving down at the end of this month!), I noticed something that I never paid attention to when I was an Angeleno. That is, the fact that people in LA are generally not that friendly.

However, as I observed more and thought of my own experiences working in the "Valley" now, I realized an important subtlety to that statement that was missing. That is, people in LA are generally not that friendly...to STRANGERS! I think everyone will agree that most Southern Californians are pretty friendly to their friends and acquaintances.

So now that I've rambled on for 2 paragraphs, many of you may be wondering what my point is and how it is related to the SecondConnection Dating blogsite. Well, the answer lies in a little experiment I tried for the past two weeks. I decided to get over my fear of being deemed a weirdo and said hello to every person I passed in my office building, on the street, or on the train to work (yes, there is a train in Los Angeles). This included deliverymen, old ladies, other guys, and of course women suitable for dating. What did I learn from all this? That people in LA are actually quite friendly if you only made the first effort!

With that, I have the following challenge for all you guys (and ladies) out there; wherever you live. I personally believe that if you take the steps I've listed below, you'll have more opportunities to make a date with a total stranger.

1. For one week, say "Hello" and smile to 10 strangers a day. Simple enough.

2. On week two, continue the "Hello" challenge and for a minimum of 3 of these strangers each day, follow it up with a genuine compliment. For the guys, this can be a simple "I really like your earrings" to a lady or a "That's a nice car" to another guy. Remember, it should be genuine and it's fine to practice with both genders. Seriously, be secure about your own sexuality. And remember, you're not hitting on the other person. For the ladies, I'm not going to give you any examples because us guys will get giddy after any compliment you give us...but that's a subject to be saved for some other blog.

3. Finally, by week three, hopefully you've mastered the challenges from Week 1 and 2 and are used to saying hi to a stranger and complimenting them without the fear of rejection. Now you are ready for that final step of making a second connection with that other person. If you're a guy, simply tell the woman "I'd really like to see you again sometime but didn't want to make you feel awkward or obligated to give me your phone number, but why don't you take my Black Card and send me a message sometime?" From what I understand, most women like guys who are confident and friendly, know how to give genuine compliments, and are considerate towards their feelings while being honest and direct. Sound good? Who knows, the woman may even be so impressed and just say why don't I give you my number instead? More power to you!

For all the Ladies out there, the SecondConnection Black Card may be of use to you as well if you don't prefer approaching guys. Next time you're not comfortable giving your number to a stranger, the Black Card offers you a safe means of communicating with somebody until you get to know them better. Or you may want to try my challenge as well! Then again, I can't say I really understand women all that well still but I'd love to hear your feedback.

Now go out there and start meeting some new people!

Till next time,
Drew